According to a survey, only 14% of couples sleep in separate beds every night. And while many of us might believe in the saying “couples who sleep apart grow apart” there are studies that show the opposite is actually true.
We at Bright Side believe that there are no wrong or right sleep arrangements, because to some, sleeping in different beds can be as pleasing as for others sharing a bed with their partner.
A poor night’s sleep can turn lovers into fighters.
According to research, sharing a bed with a partner that has restless sleep behavior can deprive you of 49 minutes of sleep each night. And, when one partner doesn’t get a proper night’s sleep because of the other, it will most likely result in a conflict between them the next day.
Actually, the study even confirmed that couples who tend to have a poor night’s sleep have more severe and more frequent fights than those who wake up well-rested. People who get a good night’s sleep, on the other hand, are more likely to be in a good mood, have lower stress levels, and be more patient.
Resenting your partner because you can’t get a good night’s sleep can be destructive to the relationship.
Snoring, fidgeting, and bed or blanket hogging are just a few of many reasons why some couples choose to sleep in different beds or even in different bedrooms. Lying awake listening to your partner snoring while you beat yourself up to fall asleep can lead to a build-up of anger, tension, and resentment toward your partner.
According to Jennifer Adams, author of Sleeping Apart Not Falling Apart, sleeping in a separate bedroom can even help a relationship thrive because both partners are not sleep deprived.
Each partner can tailor their sleeping conditions to their heart’s content.
Tina Cooper, a licensed social worker, sleeps in different bedrooms with her partner because of their opposite sleeping habits. “I’m a night owl, he’s an early bird. I need soothing sounds to fall asleep, and he likes silence. He likes a hard mattress, and I like soft and full of pillows. And because I don’t like the early day’s sunlight, my boyfriend gave me the master bedroom which gets less light and he has the second largest room that gets the sunrise he loves.”
How you spend the nighttime in your shared bedroom with your partner can also influence your daytime functioning, marital satisfaction, and psychological and physical health. And when 2 people with different bedtime preferences and nighttime schedules end up together, changing themselves just to please their partner’s needs might harm their relationship in the long run.
Sleeping in different bedrooms with your partner means that the 2 of you will have a place just for yourselves where you can relax after an exhausting day. This way, both of you can satisfy your needs without tiptoeing around and worrying about whether your partner might wake up because you want to watch the latest episode of your show before bed.
Even if you don’t remember waking up, disturbed sleep can have a negative impact on your overall health.
During the night, our brain cycles through the stages of sleep several times: light sleep, deep sleep, and REM (Rapid eye movement sleep). But when you interrupt the cycle by waking up during the night, it means that your brain spends more time in the light sleep stage and misses out on REM. And without sufficient REM your emotional well-being and cognitive performance suffer.
Interrupted sleep can also have short and long-term health consequences, like hypertension, weight-related issues, mental health problems, reduced quality of life, and other health-related issues.
People on Reddit share why they decided to sleep separately with their partner.
- “Because a good night’s sleep is more romantic than sharing a bed. I snore and toss and turn. He gives off literal village levels of heat in his sleep and I can’t stand the heat. I read, he can’t stand light. We keep different hours to an extent. A million reasons. We get along so much better this way.” — crankyweasels
- “My partner and I have completely separate bedrooms. We ’sleepover’ occasionally in each other’s rooms. However, we both sleep exponentially better apart. He’s a night owl and I’m an early bird. He wants only one sheet on him, I want 10 lbs of blankets. In addition, having a separate room allows me to decorate it however I want, have my own personal space, and keep it to the level of cleanliness I prefer. People look at us sideways when I mention the separate rooms thing, but it’s been a game-changer.” — eriasana
- “Different sleep cycles due to different work schedules. We are still madly in love and we both agreed to this because it’s the best for both of us.” — AFishInATank
- “Early in our relationship, 90% of our fights occurred in the bedroom. I like to sleep in a cold room with the fan on and white noise like a box fan. I also like to go to sleep with the TV on. She likes to sleep in a warm, still, cave in complete silence and darkness. We started sleeping in separate rooms and all of a sudden 90% of our fights stopped. Also, because we were getting real sleep, other fights turned more into heated discussions.” — ttc8420
What are your sleeping arrangements with your partner? Do you believe sleeping in different beds can help a relationship thrive?
Gordon Ramsay, 57, and His Wife Tana, 49, Proudly Introduced Their 6th Baby to the World
Gordon and Tana Ramsay are parents to a large brood, but they decided not to stop there and recently became parents for the 6th time. They welcomed their son, Jesse James, and shared heartwarming photos of the little one, who has already celebrated his first month.
After Gordon and Tana got married, they faced difficulties conceiving a child. Initially, Tanya was diagnosed with polycystic ovary syndrome, and later, Gordon encountered fertility issues. However, they didn’t give up and decided to try IVF. Fortunately, it worked, and in 1998, their first daughter Megan was born. But they didn’t stop there, and about a year later, the family welcomed two adorable twins, Jack and Holly.
In 2001, another addition to the family arrived. Little Matilda was born, and from the age of 9, she participated in her father’s culinary shows.
After the birth of their four children, Gordon and Tana had to endure a loss. In May 2016, they announced that they were expecting another child. However, a month later, Gordon revealed that the baby would not be born. At that time, his support was crucial for Tana. She shared that Gordon couldn’t be there when their four children were born, but he was with her at the most critical moment.
The loss only strengthened the family, and the couple became even more attentive to each other. Gordon never left Tana’s side, and in April 2019, he was there when their fifth child, Oscar, was born.
The birth of their sixth child was a miracle for the family. Gordon is 57 years old, and Tana is 49. The arrival of the new addition to the family brought out the tender side in both parents. Tana admitted that Gordon is, in fact, a very gentle and vulnerable person.
Despite Gordon’s well-known bold on-camera persona, he disclosed that his wife, Tana, is the stronger of the two. “Tana’s super fierce, an ex-Montessori school teacher. So, I’m the softie,” he said. His wife also confirmed this, “He is, believe it or not, incredibly sensitive.”
Following the baby’s birth, Gordon, 57, was the first to announce the news, sharing snapshots of their newest addition to the Ramsay family. On his Instagram gallery, the Kitchen Nightmares host captioned, “What an amazing birthday present please welcome Jesse James Ramsay, 7lbs 10oz whopper,” he captioned the post.
The heartwarming photo captured the baby boy in a snug white onesie decorated with tiny red, blue, and gray stars. Wrapped in a blanket, the little one looked more than cozy. Tana, 49, expressed her feelings in the caption, “One month of this little one already, loving every minute.”
Motherhood after 40 is becoming more and more common. Take a look at other stars who have given birth after the age of 40, and some even after 50.
Preview photo credit tanaramsay / Instagram, gordongram / Instagram
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