Here’s Why I Refused to Take Care of My Mother with Disability– Story of the Day

My mother had a clear favorite her entire life, while I was raised by my grandparents mostly. When she got old and sick, I helped financially but refused to do more than that for a crucial reason.

While most good parents would tell you that they don’t have a favorite, my mother was not ashamed to tell me that my brother, Stanley, was her golden boy. My father walked out of our family because caring for two children became too much.

In the end, my mother blamed me for it. “He wouldn’t have left if I hadn’t gotten pregnant with you,” she told me one day. I was just a child at the time and only wanted my mother’s love.

“But that’s not my fault,” I replied. “I didn’t ask to be born.”

“Don’t talk back to me! I’m the parent, and you’re the kid, so shut up,” she finished. We would have similar conversations through the years whenever she was mad at me. Finally, my mother sent me to live with my paternal grandparents.

They felt so bad that our father had walked away from our lives that they took me in and gave me all the love I never received at home. That’s how I learned that the word family has lots of meanings.

All I heard about my mother and brother over the years was that she helped him with everything. He got into some trouble with the police, and my mother paid all his legal fees. Eventually, she had to sell her house and pay for his apartment.

Stanley was spoiled and couldn’t hold down a job, but my mother coddled him. Meanwhile, my grandparents didn’t have much money, but they gave me everything they could. I had to work to afford my college and my home.

I learned a whole ton of responsibility, and when I graduated, I got a pretty decent job. That’s where I met my husband, Lawrence. We had two daughters whom I cherished equally. When my grandparents got sick, I was there for them until the very end.

They gave me their house, and one of my daughters moved there when she got married. Unfortunately, my husband died shortly after her wedding. She asked me to live with her, but I wanted to stay in our home.

I didn’t hear from my brother or my mother for many years. They didn’t care about me at all, so why should I care about them? But one day, Stanley called. “Hello?” I answered the phone.

“Hey, Brooke. It’s Stanley. How are you?” my brother said through the other line.

“Oh, hey, Stanley. Long time, no speak. I’m fine. How about you?” I replied.

“Yeah, it’s been a while. Listen, I’m calling because Mom broke her hip. I need your help,” Stanley continued.

“Oh, that’s too bad. Is she ok?” I asked.

“She’s fine. It’s just that the hospital bill will be pretty expensive, and I need help paying for it. She’s our mother after all,” he explained.

“Oh, well. Ok. Give me the details, and I’ll send some money,” I told him. My husband and I had accumulated decent savings, so I could afford to send Stanley some money for whatever our mother needed.

“That’s great, Brooke. Thank you. I’ll talk to you later,” Stanley said and hung up. I didn’t feel any obligation to my mother, but I wasn’t heartless. I sent him the money and forgot about it until a week later when my brother called again.

“Hey, Brooke!” Stanley started.

“Hey. How did everything go?” I asked.

“The operation for her hip went well, but the doctor just told me she’s going to need tons of rehab and round-the-clock care. I was wondering when you could come to pick her up?” my brother asked.

“What do you mean pick her up?” I probed, confused.

“I told you. She needs someone to take care of her. I’ve been by her side our whole lives. It’s time you take responsibility, Brooke. I can’t watch her,” Stanley added.

“Excuse me? Responsibility? Mom sent me to live with our grandparents because she hated me, and you were her golden boy. She essentially abandoned me,” I snapped.

“Please. Stop the melodrama. You need to step up because she needs you. She gave you life. You owe her,” Stanley demanded.

“No. I don’t owe her anything. I needed my mother when I was growing up, and she refused. She gave all her love to you, so you will need to figure out something. I gave you money for her hospital bills out of the goodness of my heart, but I won’t be her caretaker,” I told him.

“YOU’RE HORRIBLE, BROOKE! HOW CAN YOU DO THIS? I CAN’T WATCH HER!” Stanley started screaming through the phone.

“Honestly, I don’t care, Stanley. You don’t get to call me horrible. I was a kid when she abandoned me, and my grandparents became my REAL PARENTS. Don’t call me again!” I finished and hung up the call.

Stanley tried calling, texting, e-mailing, and more for several days, but I blocked him. He also tried contacting my daughters, but they refused to listen to him. They knew my history with that side of the family.

Of course, Stanley and my mother bad-mouthed me to anyone who would listen. I have been severely judged for my decision, but I didn’t listen to their criticism. After all, no one ever judged my mother for what she did to me.

What can we learn from this story?

  1. Caring for your loved ones is important. While Brooke’s choice is controversial, it’s easy to understand her point of view, given her background.
  2. Forgiveness is divine. Sometimes, you have to be the bigger person. Caring for your parents when they’re old is a big duty, both financially and emotionally. Someone has to do it.

Share this story with your friends. It might brighten their day and inspire them.

If you enjoyed this story, you might like this one about a mother who left her disabled daughter at an orphanage.

The flight attendant approached me and requested, “Please remain seated after we land; the pilot would like to speak with you personally.”

I thought my big business trip to LA was going to be just another day until a mysterious request from the pilot left me questioning everything I knew about my past. The truth he shared would alter my future in ways I never imagined.

My flight to Los Angeles was supposed to be a smooth one, but what happened during that two-hour journey changed my life forever. But before I tell you about it, let me share why I had to reach LA that day.

So, I work as an architect at a well-known construction firm, and this is my dream job. Let me tell you, it wasn’t good luck that brought me here. It was my hard work and all those sleepless nights I spent in college upgrading my skills and learning new concepts.

Recently, my boss gave me an opportunity to present a big project to some of our top investors in Los Angeles.

It was a HUGE thing because it could lead to a long-awaited promotion, so I happily accepted the opportunity.

Honestly, I felt so grateful for it because it was also a chance to make my mom, Melissa, proud. She’s my best friend, and that’s mainly because she has raised me as a single parent. She told me my father passed away before I was born, but she never stopped me from chasing my dreams. Mom’s always been there to support me, and I love her for that.

So, when I told her about the meeting in LA, she hugged me and said, “Go get ’em, sweetie! I’ll be praying for you.”

The time flew by at the airport, and soon I found myself comfortably seated on the plane, ready to take off. The flight attendants were all so welcoming, and I lucked out with an empty seat next to me!

As the plane began to ascend, I couldn’t help but feel excited. I was well-prepared for my presentation, hoping the investors would like it.

A few minutes into the flight, a friendly-looking flight attendant named Bethany approached me with a tray of drinks.

“Can I get you something to sip on?” she asked with a smile.

“Just orange juice, please,” I replied, raising my hand to accept the glass. As I did, Bethany glanced down at the birthmark on my wrist.

“I’m sorry, could I have your passport, please?” she asked suddenly.

Well, that’s strange, I thought.

Confused but not wanting to argue, I handed it over. Bethany looked it over carefully before returning it with a nod.

“Just a standard protocol check. Thank you!”

Sounds cool.

A short while later, Bethany returned to my seat.

“Excuse me, will you be in a rush after we land?” she asked.

“Yeah, I’ve got a connecting flight to catch and I’m already running late,” I explained as I subconsciously clasped my hands together.

“Well, the pilot wants to speak with you after we land.”

“The pilot?” I asked. “Why? Can’t he just talk to me now?”

“I’m afraid not,” Bethany replied in a serious tone. “He wants to talk to you in person. I know you’re in a hurry, but trust me, you’ll want to hear this. You’ll regret it if you don’t.”

I sat there, utterly perplexed.

What on earth could the pilot possibly need to tell me? And why did it have to wait until after we landed? My big meeting was hanging in the balance, and I didn’t want to risk missing my connection. But Bethany’s insistence made me feel like this was something important.

As the plane touched down and the other passengers began filing out, I steeled myself and waited patiently for the pilot to approach.

When the cabin was finally empty, a tall man with graying hair entered, his eyes immediately locking onto mine.

At that point, I literally dropped my bag and jacket. My jaw just about hit the floor because I could’ve sworn I had seen this man before.

I instantly recognized him from old photos my mom had shown me. This was Steve, her childhood friend.

But the man didn’t look happy to see me.

In fact, tears were streaming down his face as he threw his arms around me in a tight embrace. I stood there, completely bewildered, as he sobbed into my shoulder.

“What’s going on?” I asked in a shaky voice. “What happened?”

He pulled away, gazing at me with red-rimmed eyes. Then, he gently took my hand and revealed a birthmark on his wrist. It was an exact match to the one on mine.

“Courtney,” he choked out, “I’m your father.”

“Wait, what?” I looked at him with eyes wide open. “My father? But Mom said…

Why did Mom lie to me? I thought. Why didn’t she ever tell me that Steve was my father?

“I don’t know what Melissa told you, Courtney, but this is the truth,” Steve continued. “She suddenly disappeared from my life when I was about to attend aviation school.

“She didn’t even tell me she was pregnant… I… I got to know through a friend but it was years after you were born.”

At that point, all I wanted to do was confront Mom. I wanted to find out why she left Steve. I wanted to know why she hid everything from me.

I immediately pulled out my phone and called her.

“Mom, why didn’t you ever tell me about Steve?” I demanded as soon as she answered. I had her on speakerphone so Steve could hear. “Why did you keep this from me?”

“Steve? What do you mean, sweetie?” she asked, still trying to hide the truth from me.

“Mom, please stop!” I rolled my eyes. “I just met Steve on the airplane. He’s here with me. Now please tell me everything. I need answers. He needs answers!”

After a few seconds of silence, Mom finally spoke. Her voice was thick with emotion as she began to explain.

“Oh, Courtney, I’m so sorry,” she cried. “When we were young, Steve wanted to go to aviation school and become a pilot. But then I got pregnant with you… and… and I knew that if he found out, he would give up his dreams to be with us…”

“I couldn’t let him do that,” she continued after a pause. “So, I left without telling him. I thought it was the right thing to do at the time, but I can see now how much it’s hurt all of us.”

Steve’s face crumpled as he listened.

“Melissa,” he choked out, “I… I loved you so much. I would have done anything for you and our child… Why didn’t you trust me?”

“Steve? Oh my…” Mom gasped. “I… I thought I was protecting you. I was scared. I’m sorry, Steve. I’m so, so sorry.”

I felt like my head was spinning. All these years, my mom had lied to me about my father’s fate, and now here he was, a complete stranger, pouring his heart out to both of us. I couldn’t process it all.

“Mom, this is… this is a lot to take in,” I stammered. “I’m already late for the big meeting with the investors… I don’t know how I’ll get to LA now.”

Steve’s eyes widened as I mentioned the investors.

“You’re going to LA? What’s the meeting about?”

I quickly explained the details to Steve. I told him how I was supposed to present a major project to secure a big promotion at work.

I saw his expression shift as I told him everything about the company and the investors.

“Well then, we can’t let you miss that meeting,” he declared, “because I know those investors very well, Courtney.”

“What? How?” I asked.

“I used to fly their private jet a few years ago, and they were very kind to me,” Steve revealed as he slid out his phone. “Let me make a few calls, and I’ll get you in front of them today.”

True to his word, he sprang into action, making a series of hushed phone calls. Within an hour, I found myself being ushered into a swanky conference room. I couldn’t believe it.

The best part was that the meeting went better than I could have imagined. The investors were impressed and agreed to fund my project idea. Besides that, I got a call from my boss and he offered me the promotion I had been hoping for. I was super happy!

As I walked out of the room, I saw Steve waiting for me with open arms.

“You did it!” he exclaimed, pulling me into a tight hug. “I’m so proud of you, Courtney.”

I felt a lump in my throat as I hugged him back.

This man, whom I had never known, was now an integral part of my life, and somehow, it felt right. All those years of feeling like something was missing had led me to this moment, and I couldn’t help but wonder what else the future had in store.

The next week, Steve visited our house to meet Mom.

It was an emotional reunion, filled with tears, laughter, and a sense of wholeness that had been missing for so long. That day, I understood what it felt like to have a complete family.

As I lay in bed that night, I couldn’t stop thinking about the incredible turn of events. Who would have thought that a routine flight to LA would lead to the discovery of my long-lost father? It was the kind of plot twist you only see in the movies. But here I was, living it.

And while it was overwhelming, I couldn’t help but feel a sense of gratitude and excitement for what the future might hold.

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