Kinky Friedman, known for his satirical and often provocative style, has passed away at 79. A post on his social media announced, “Kinky Friedman stepped on a rainbow at his beloved Echo Hill surrounded by family & friends.
Kinkster endured tremendous pain & unthinkable loss in recent years but he never lost his fighting spirit and quick wit.
Kinky will live on as his books are read and his songs are sung.”
Richard Samet “Kinky” Friedman earned a cult following for his unique take on country and Western music.
He released numerous albums, starting with “Sold American” in 1973, a record that laid the foundation for his career.
Known as the “governor of the heart of Texas,” he even toured with Bob Dylan during the “Rolling Thunder Revue” and made history as the “first full-blooded Jew” to perform at the Grand Ole Opry.
Apart from his musical endeavors, Friedman was a prolific writer. He wrote detective novels and contributed as a columnist for Texas Monthly.
He also ventured into politics, running for Governor of Texas in 2006 with the campaign slogan “My Governor is a Jewish Cowboy,” securing 12.6 percent of the votes among six candidates.
Born in Chicago and raised in Texas, Friedman studied psychology at the University of Texas at Austin.
His passion for music led him to form King Arthur & the Carrots and later Kinky Friedman and the Texas Jewboys. He described the latter as a “country band with a social conscience, a demented love child of Lenny Bruce and Bob Wills.”
Reflecting on his life, Friedman once wrote, “Somewhere in heaven, I’m sure there’s a quiet corner with a big easy chair, a bright floor lamp, a big stack of biographical books, and a few old dogs wagging their tails to the faint smell of cigar smoke.”
My father was boasting about financing my college education even though he hadn’t contributed financially, so I corrected his false claims with the truth
During my childhood and teenage years, I felt the weight of my father’s strict expectations. Instead of being supportive, he focused on control. His voice often echoed in my mind, reminding me of his “random checks” of my room and school bags, which felt more like an interrogation than genuine concern.
His high standards didn’t just apply at home; they spilled into my school life too. He insisted that I must earn at least a B in every subject, always pushing me to do better. This constant pressure built up a lot of anxiety in me and drove me to succeed, but mostly out of fear rather than passion.
As I got older, I became determined to break free from his tight grip, especially when it came to my college education. I decided to fund my own schooling, so my father couldn’t use financial control against me. In contrast, my cousin had a much different experience. His parents, my aunt and uncle, were involved in his life but respected his independence. They supported his education without making him feel pressured. This difference in our upbringings made me acutely aware of the heavy burden I carried.
When I graduated from high school, I made the choice to pay for my college myself. I took on part-time jobs and student loans, accepting the debt rather than risking my father’s influence over me. Interestingly, during this time, my father never offered financial help. He seemed unconcerned about my struggles, yet he painted a different picture to others.
He liked to present himself as the supportive dad who was investing in my future. At social gatherings, he would boast about how much he was contributing to my education, enjoying the praise he received for being a caring father. This false story was something he maintained without a hint of shame.
This charade continued until one summer evening at a family barbecue. During a relaxed conversation, my uncle, unaware of the truth, asked my father how much my education was costing him. Without hesitation, my father responded with pride, claiming it was a significant investment for my future.
Hearing this blatant lie ignited a fire in me. I knew I couldn’t let this continue. While I didn’t confront him then, I began planning how to reveal the truth in a way that left no doubt about my actual journey through college. I waited for graduation day, knowing it would be the perfect time to set the record straight. I invited my family, including my father, making sure they would all be there for what I had planned.
On graduation day, I felt a mix of nerves and determination. As I prepared to speak, I understood the weight of this moment. It represented not just my academic achievement but also a personal declaration. When it was my turn, I approached the podium, heart racing. The audience quieted, and I began: “Today, I want to thank the person who truly made this possible… myself. I financed my college education through hard work, determination, and countless hours of part-time jobs”.
The reaction was immediate. Gasps and murmurs filled the room as images of my college experience appeared on the screen behind me, pictures of late nights studying, work schedules, and tuition checks, all from my own earnings.
“Every dollar I earned and every exam I passed was done without any financial aid from my father”, I continued, glancing at my father’s shocked expression. The atmosphere shifted as my words sank in. The images contrasted sharply with my father’s claims, creating a powerful moment of personal vindication and public clarification.
After the ceremony, family reactions varied. Some were surprised, while others admired my independence. My aunt approached me, looking regretful. “We had no idea you did this all on your own”, she said, her tone apologetic. I wasn’t seeking sympathy but rather acknowledgment of my hard work. This recognition was more fulfilling than any comforting words could offer.
Later, my uncle, clapping me on the back, remarked with respect: “You really showed him. You took control and told the truth”. “Yes, I suppose I did”, I replied, feeling a sense of freedom that went beyond just graduating. “But more importantly, I showed myself what I’m capable of.”
That day marked the end of my college journey and the beginning of a new chapter in my life, free from my father’s oppressive expectations. I had proven to myself and others that I could face significant challenges on my own terms.
My experience in college, funded by my hard work, was a testament to resilience and self-reliance. Standing there with my peers and family, I knew that exciting new adventures awaited me, filled with the promise of freedom and the thrill of self-determination. I walked away not just with a diploma but with a deep understanding of my own strength and capability.
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