Moms have a lot on their plates every day.
Parents have a lot on their plates and rarely get a break because they have to juggle numerous tasks throughout the day, such as washing the kids’ sticky hands and faces, folding their laundry, making sure they have breakfast and lunch, and getting them ready for school.
No matter how hard they try, there’s bound to be some kind of disaster waiting around the corner, like a glass of milk knocked over, a toy you accidentally stepped on, or a stain somewhere.
Few mothers can afford the luxury of a short shower before turning in or taking some time for themselves.
Some things we take for granted as parents are touched upon in a recent piece by Heather Duckworth, a mother who has been through it all.
The messes kids make as they mature before our eyes into the persons we’ve always imagined they’ll become are an integral part of that process.
It’s important to remember that our children will look back on the messes we cleaned up as adults and use those memories as the greatest testament to the childhood we gave them, so it’s worth the effort to find the joy in the midst of the chaos.
Regrettably, not all women get to experience the turmoil and clutter that children create.
Likewise, not all parents are able to enjoy the joy that children bring into their lives.
The popular post by Heather titled “The Blue Stain” resonated with many new and expectant mothers.
Heather’s heart started pounding as she scrubbed the grout her daughter had formed with the slime, remembering the disaster she had to remove all those years ago.
After a long day of running around after her two-year-old triplets and four-year-old older brother, picking up toys, and making sure no one got hurt in the piles of laundry she couldn’t finish that day, this mother would reflect, “My hands were full, but so was my heart.”
Before turning in for the night, Heather and her two sons danced to the radio while they tidied up the playroom.
Nobody could have predicted that it would be the last time they laughed so hard for a while.
It was just as she was settling in for a good night’s sleep herself that she heard one of the lads remark, “Uh, Oh,” and she saw the huge blue stain that would haunt her dreams forever.
The pen one of the triplets was holding burst in his grasp, spraying ink everywhere. His hands, face, and pajamas were all blue, giving the impression that the tiny boy was a smurf.
While she watched, Heather felt like a bad mother and began to get angry.
She hadn’t been angry with her son, but she did hold herself responsible because she had left the pen where youngsters could easily access it. Her feelings got the best of her.
“I gasped as I saw blue splatters across the floor and a thick pool of ink sinking into our carpet – our brand new carpet. I quickly yelled for my husband, who had been doing the dishes, to come and help me. I instantly felt so upset as I grabbed my son and took him to the bathroom to clean him up and my husband started scrubbing those bright blue stains on our carpet.”
Heather’s feelings of annoyance and fury would always resurface whenever she saw the stain on the fresh new carpet. All the wonderful times she had with her sons were symbolized by the stain until the day it was finally removed.
The youngster who spilled blue paint on the carpet was diagnosed with cancer a month later, and he died two years later, leaving the stain as a memento of their time together.
“It was still there . . . and now . . . it was a constant reminder of my son. It was a constant reminder of my frustration over something so trivial . . . something so unimportant in the scheme of life.
That blue stain was a constant reminder that life is messy, but that’s what makes it worth living. A constant reminder to not sweat the small stuff. A constant reminder that ‘things’ aren’t important, but people are. A constant reminder that accidents happen. A constant reminder to let go of the little things and hang on tight to what is important.”
She tried to cover up the vivid blue stain with the furniture, but every time she cleaned the room, there it was, staring at her, reminding her of her loss and the sorrow she was still feeling.
Heather’s story is meant to remind us of how often we take life for granted and fail to appreciate the little things that give our lives meaning. She feels the need to inform all the moms out there that the dirty laundry and strewn about toys are what really make the house a place of comfort and safety for their families.
Those messes, made by the people who matter most to us, are what make our lives worthwhile, as Heather puts it, because there will come a day when we will miss those moments very much indeed. “I would have a million blue ink stains on my carpet if it meant I could have one more day with my son.”
Her advice to moms: don’t let yourself get so wrapped up in the world that you miss out on quality time with your kids. Life is too short to be wasted scrubbing stains, so prioritize what matters most!
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This Star Is Now Living Privately with Famous Spouse – He Proposed on 2nd Date & Still Loves Her at Any Weight
Delta Burke had once been in the center of the spotlight with project after project lining up for her, but after leaving “Designing Women,” her fame and work also started to fizzle out.
After having almost not-so-successful projects, the actress decided to stay out of the spotlight and live life like a regular citizen.
Despite her many changes, her husband of more than three decades declared he would still love her no matter what. Here’s a look into Delta Burke’s life.
Delta Burke came into the limelight when she won the Miss Florida title in 1974. She went on to the Miss America Pageant, won a talent scholarship, and studied at the London Academy of Music and Dramatic Arts.
Burke got into film in 1979 when she starred in “The Seekers” and “The Chisholms.” However, she is best known as Suzanne Sugarbaker in the 1986 series “Designing Women.”
She started a production company that produced “Delta” and “Women of the House,” and Burke starred in both projects. Later, she started her clothing design company called Delta Burke Design.
Burke took the role of Suzanne Sugarbaker in “Designing Women” for five out of the seven seasons the show ran for because the show’s producers fired her.
After firing her, she said the executive producers, Linda Bloodworth-Thomason and Harry Thomason, psychologically abused her.
However, the executive producers and the show’s stars said Burke made things difficult for everybody, so they fired her. Burke said,
“Basically, it became unbearable into the second season for me. By the end of the fourth season, I just couldn’t live like that anymore.”
Burke described the work environment as bizarre, and people didn’t believe her. She then went to ask for help from people who had power, and they didn’t help her.
Even though she missed her character after a few months, she said she had no regrets about being off the show. After over a year, she said she had gotten used to her weight but wanted to lose some pounds.
But after leaving “Designing Women,” she changed her looks and was reportedly looking heavier than before in the next series she starred in titled “Dayo.”
In 2012, while shooting her show “Counter Culture,” Burke fell. The fall led to the cancellation of the show. After that, Burke stayed out of the spotlight for some years.
Later, when she was spotted going out for lunch, she looked entirely different. In place of her signature bouffant hair was a brunette bob, and she ditched the vivid lipstick for a relatively makeup-free face.
The actress who suffered very public weight battles had also lost some weight. Besides weight problems, she had battled with depression, hoarding problems, and obsessive-compulsive disorder.
In 2008, she sought treatment at a psychiatric hospital, and even though she wasn’t looking forward to any work, she felt more than happy with life.
Burke, who is healthier and happier, was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes. However, she said her husband, Gerald McRaney, always reminds her what to eat and what not to eat.
Despite everything she and her husband have gone through, her husband will always love her no matter what. She said,
“Mac loves me no matter what. He loved me when I got as big as a house. He loved me when I was a blonde.”
She said her husband didn’t tell her he hated her blonde hair until she returned to brunette. He always loved her through any situation and still thinks her body looks great even though she feels it does not.
Burke and McRaney met in 1987 when she was a guest star on his detective show “Simon & Simon.” He knew he had competition, but McRaney was not ready to let her go.
McRaney asked her to marry him on their second date even though his friends were against it. They never wanted him to marry an actress, but McRaney knew only an actress would understand his work hours.
In 1989, they got married, and their marriage was McRaney’s third marriage but Burke’s first.
McRaney started acting in junior high school after injuring his knees during a football session. He was a guest star on “Gunsmoke: Hard Labor” before making his big break on “Simon & Simon” in 1981.
Burke and the “This Is Us” actor never had children together, but she became the proud stepmom to his kids from his previous marriages.
The couple worked together on different projects, and McRaney revealed that, unlike other couples, they do better when they are together 24/7.
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